Our Second Christmas without Dominic

Last year, we spent our first Christmas without the baby we lost through miscarriage at almost 18 weeks gestation. Like many around this time of year, instead of being a joyful event, Christmas turns into a burden that we don’t necessarily fully look forward to but instead dread.

Grief overpowered me last year and this year it was still there at a different level. As much as I desired my  heart to be more joyful this time of year, my heart just was what it was because someone was missing. People have many different ways of dealing with grief. Some may choose to ignore it or deny it, some may set it aside, some may resort to bitterness and anger, and some choose to deal with it head on. How do you deal with grief?

The neat thing is that even though we may be stuck in grief, it is difficult to ignore the fact that Jesus is now with us as a baby spreading peace all over the world. Mary desires with all her heart for us to touch him and hold him. He is the Saviour of the world. She wants us to draw near to him and weep with joy.

Before Christmas, I was drawn to listen to an old cassette I bought on one of my two trips to Medjugorje. The cassette is called “The Story of a Wounded Womb” by Sister Emmanuel. One of the things that Sister Emmanuel talks about is about a man she met who was in deep distress and hopeless. His life was on the brink of being turned upside down. This man was in Medjugorje, received a tape about a man named Albert who made a deal with Our Lady. The deal was he would give all of his burdens to Our Lady and in return he would pray for Our Lady’s intentions.

He met Sister Emmanuel and told her about all of his hardships. He said he was going to give Our Lady all of his problems. The next day, he was looking for Sister Emmanuel to talk to her before leaving. He was weeping for joy because he prayed for hours for Our Lady’s intentions with his heart. He told Sister Emmanuel that he received a telegram saying he got his job back after being fired. His wife did not want a divorce anymore and his health was not so serious as to require surgery.

What would happen if we all gave Our Lady our burdens? In exchange, what if we prayed for all of Our Lady’s intentions? Perhaps we can start with, “Mary, I give my burdens to you and I will offer up this rosary for your intentions…” Amen.

Merry Christmas everyone!

May God richly bless you and give you the graces you need to deal with all of your burdens.

Lucille Everett

Some experiences from Medjugorje

Lucille's post on Medjugorje brought back some memories of my experiences while there with her two years ago now.

It was Lucille's second trip and my first. We were taking the opportunity to take a trip before "Little Pea" was born. We were about five months into our first pregnancy at that point.

Lucille had spoken to me on many occasions about her experiences during her first trip to Medjugorje. I listened to them with essentially a grain of salt. In fact, it was with great difficulty that Lucille convinced me to go in the first place! My decision was based on her desire to go and not mine. I essentially went because she wanted to.

Near the beginning of my Journey with the Lord, I had some bad experiences with some individuals who had been there and to other shrines around the world. When I had sat down with them to listen to their stories and experiences I found them pretty neat. But what happened though, was that I got a sense that some of these people's faith was reliant on going to these Holy Shrines, and in speaking about "miraculous and prophetic" things.

I struggled with that because in my perspective one needed only to have a deep and personal relationship with Jesus Christ. My relationship with Him, in my experience, was built on spending time with Him in prayer, meditation, contemplation, and before the Most Blessed Sacrament.

So, there I was, on a plane flying across the ocean for the first time. I was cranky and frustrated. It wasn't until we were done with the plane rides and sitting on a bus heading for Medjugorje that I began to relax a little. It was beautiful in that part of the world.

With the encouragement of Lucille I began to enjoy the ride, listening to her stories about her previous trip. When we arrived in Medjugorje it was getting dark. We were pointed to our hotel and eventually our room. The room was fresh, yet sparse and simple. I liked it.

And then Our Lord and Our Lady started to break the hardness of my heart. This trip was for Lucille, and I offered up as such. I did not expect anything in return. However, they had other plans. ;)

Please note that the Church has not ruled on the validity or legitimacy of the Apparitions in Medjugorje, so what I am sharing is strictly from my perspective, that is Personal Revelation.

One little miracle was on our first visit to the church. It was close to the regular time that Our Lady appears to the visionaries. The rosary is paused at sometime just after 6 PM while the apparitions happen. It was during that time that Little Pea made a big jump in Lucille's womb. We were both very much surprised by that experience, and it influenced our choice of the name, Anne-Marie for Little Pea when she was born. Anne-Marie has indeed been our little miracle baby. She demonstrates an amazing faith and relationship with our Lord.

Another little miracle happened later on during our stay, we were there about a week or so, when Lucille and I were with the group listening to Sister Clare Marie of the Oasis of Peace Community share with us about her faith and what brought her to Medjugorje in the first place. During her sharing my heart caught fire. A number of key things were said by Sister Clare Marie that helped me to let go of all of my anger and frustration and for the first time in a long time my heart was completely open and on fire. After the talk, while walking back to get our ride back to our hotel I shared with Lucille about what was happening. I wanted my heart to stay open, especially with Lucille.

There were a number of other little miracles through our stay there. However, they were not necessarily the focus nor the reason for our visit there. They were only the triggers. What they triggered was a renewed hunger to spend time with the Lord. Everyday we were there we were in Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament, celebrating Mass and receiving Communion, praying the rosary, and building our marriage relationship in the Lord. We were immersed in an ongoing spirit of prayer and conversion. The Confessional lines were huge, people raced into the church for Mass so they could get the front seats, the spirit of reverence for the Lord in the Most Blessed Sacrament was amazing, and so much more.

As I look back today at how that trip had an effect on each of us, our marriage, and most especially our relationship with our Lord, I can see some fruits. We began visiting our Lord in the Most Blessed Sacrament in a local parish that had Perpetual Adoration. Sometimes together, sometimes on our own we made a point to visit. We started to pray the rosary as a family. We aimed to pray everyday, but we were not always successful. We tried to get to daily Mass when schedules permitted. These things are still going on today. I have since forgiven those who were originally involved in turning me off from places like Medjugorje, and my heart has healed.

While places like Medjugorje are great to visit, and can succeed in drawing us closer to our Lord Jesus, Our Lady, and the Saints, I still see the greatest miracle that exists anywhere in the world is the Mass. It is the Lord Jesus Christ who comes to us in His Body and Blood to feed us and strengthen us for this Journey of life. It is also the Lord Jesus Christ who remains completely vulnerable while exposed in the monstrance on the altars of the world. What a truly amazing gift it is that I can go and pay a visit to Jesus personally in our Perpetual Adoration chapel here in the diocese anytime.

Our Lady is a good Mother. She knows very well what is best for her children. And thus, I try and listen to her, "do whatever he tells you." John 2:5

Pax vobis,

J.E.

Alive in Your Faith

What does it truly mean to be alive in your faith? I heard of and experienced a variety of situations through pilgrimages, conferences, meetings, church etc ... Catholic and non-Catholic of that feeling of 'alive in faith'. As a Catholic, I think that sometimes our faith can be seen as weak generally speaking. But, for some reason I can go to another Catholic church and experience a difference in the amount of energy within the parish in terms of singing, praising, and worship. I must admit certain Protestant churches are truly gifted when it comes to proclaiming their faith and everyone singing together in harmony.
Why is that? Rarely do I go to a Catholic church where I experience everyone singing together. Don't get me wrong, singing isn’t the only thing that defines a person's faith but it can play a significant role in intensifying your faith experience at church.
I believe as Catholics, we have a lot to learn from one another. And yet, "bridging that divide" per se between Protestants and Catholics is not an easy task. As Catholic, I find for the most part my belief system to be so diverse thus making it more difficult to connect with someone from another Christian church. Some beliefs are the same but are the reasons always the same for believing strongly in a certain value?
On the subject of being alive in my faith, truly alive in my faith, the event that comes to mind was the faith I experienced in Medjugorje. Never have I experienced my Catholic faith so strongly in such a universal way within the community. The people there, were alive in their faith. It seemed like the air, trees, flowers, and birds were so much more beautiful and alive. Never have I sung the songs at Mass, lifting my heart in praise and worship and my whole being as during my two trips to Medjugorje. My heart wanted to jump out for joy at the words that were sung because people around me were also doing the same. Their faith and mine were equal, universal singing to our Lord with all our might. My heart was so completely open to Jesus like never before throughout all of the Mass. When I came back to my ordinary life in Canada, what struck me right away when at Mass was the difference that I sensed within the celebration. I yearned to experience what I experienced in Medjugorje. Fortunately, I did have similar experiences at a few events, mostly conferences or pilgrimages attended here in Canada. At church I would experience the depth of faith mostly at celebrations for the Most Blessed Sacrament. I relished every minute because I knew how rare this experience was for me.
It has always been my heartfelt hope and prayer that someday with the intercession of Our Lady that we will all come to a point of being completely open in our hearts to proclaiming, singing, rejoicing in our Catholic faith!
Allelluia!

A good Medjugorje web site.

Lucille E.