I sensed the word, "in the womb". When I opened my heart to that word I saw in my contemplation a little ball embed itself into the womb and slowly develop into a little child. As the child grew I became aware of the little one's surroundings. There was the dim light from one side, the gurgling that was pretty much constant, the warmth of the fluid around the child and the resistance of that fluid as the limbs moved about in it. I sensed the child's deep spirit of peace. The little one was at home.
In the background of my mind and heart I've been chewing on that word and the contemplative moment for a few hours now. And here are some of the insights that the word and that moment have given me:
"At this time the disciples came to Jesus and said, 'Who is the greatest in the kingdom of Heaven?' So he called a little child to him whom he set among them. Then he said, 'In truth I tell you, unless you change and become like little children you will never enter the kingdom of Heaven. And so, the one who makes himself as little as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of Heaven." Matthew 18:1-4Jesus says that we must become, "like little children" in order to receive the Kingdom of Heaven. And not only that, the more we become "little" like a child, the greater will be our reward in Heaven.
The vision takes this call of Jesus one step further. For, the little one in the womb is indeed the littlest of all children. The child in the womb is dependent on their mother for absolutely everything. The umbilical cord brings nourishment and removes any wastes. The fluid in the womb provides an excellent buffer zone to protect the child from possible hurt. Along with the gurgling, the mother's heart beat would provide a constant and rhythmic sound in the child's environment. That heart beat would be filled with love for that child.
This image brings to mind the spiritual and mystical relationship that St. John of the Cross, St. Teresa of Avila, St. Therese of Lisieux, St. John Marie Vianney, and many others like them had with God. They lived in total relationship with God, completely abandoning themselves to Him. God provided their sole source of nourishment, He cleansed them with the Blood of Jesus to remove the waste of sin, and God provided their purpose in life. Like the little one's utter dependence upon their mother while in the womb, the saints recognized their complete and utter dependence on God.
The saints were almost completely at peace with their life because they recognized that God's hand was there. Like the little one in the womb, God's hand may not have been readily apparent, but, like that same child in the womb, they trusted fully that He was indeed working in them. Even in the midst of the deepest of struggles and depths of aridity in their spiritual lives, they still maintained a thread of connection with their God. The umbilical cord!
And, like the child growing in the womb, the saints became supple to the working of the Holy Spirit to grow deeper in their relationship with God. They continued making decisions that led them deeper and deeper until it was time to be "born".
I am confident, that like parents who are ecstatic with their new little child that just came into the world, God, the saints, and the angels all greatly celebrate the arrival into Heaven of another child of God.
And finally, I sensed two calls from the Lord.
The first is to learn to abandon ourselves to Him. To embrace the humility and purity we need to be fully attached to Him.
In Psalm 46:10 we hear the Lord say, "be still and know that I am God". The second call from Jesus is to listen in the stillness of our own heart for the beating of His Most Sacred Heart. "I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you,..."
Pax vobis,
J.E.
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