Saturday, October 08, 2005

John - Romance - The Date

As a husband, it is of particular importance to keep the romance in our marriage alive. I must admit that I have not always been able to do that. There is, in my experience, some startling differences between the male and female psyches, and, this is definitely one area!

Lucille sometimes needs to remind me that she needs to be romanced. She needs to feel that I still have a romantic love for her. She needs to have us spend exclusive time getting reconnected to each other. She needs to receive the gift of me and my time freely and out of love for her.

I, on the other hand, tend to place the romantic aspect of our relationship much further down on the list of priorities. So, indeed I need to be reminded of her needs.

This is especially true when we had our first child. We did not get any exclusive time together for a long time after Anne-Marie was born! When we both realized this and Anne-Marie was old enough, we made arrangements for someone we trust to sit with her.

We went out for dinner and had an awesome time. We made a rule that we would not talk about Anne-Marie and about parenting if we could help it. We managed somewhat to do that, but eventually we didn't get too far on that one at first! ;)

The beauty of that date time though, was being able to look into her eyes, to hold her hands across the dinner table, and to just be in her presence. We then made a commitment to try and get out on a date at least once a month. We haven't been able to make that happen as often as we had hoped, but when we do get out we have a really good time.

My dad is coming over to sit Anne-Marie this afternoon and this evening. So, we are off. I booked us into this amazing Thai restaurant for supper, and then I am going to take her for a Bubble Tea and a movie. She was very pleased when I let her know that I had made the reservations! Sometimes I won't tell her anything about the date at all as Lucille has this amazing curiosity bug that gets really cute when I drop a hint about a surprise but won't say anything more!

So, to you husbands, and soon to be husbands my advice is this: Pray to the Holy Spirit to attune your spirit to the romantic needs of your wife. Pray that the Holy Spirit truly trains you in the art of woo till you both sing together:

My love is a sachet of myrrh
lying between my breasts.
My love is a cluster of henna flowers
among the vines of En-Gedi.

-How beautiful you are, my beloved,
how beautiful you are!
Your eyes are doves.

-How beautiful you are, my love,
and how you delight me! (Song of Songs 1:13-16)

Indeed, God is good!

Pax vobis,


Here is Lucille's point of view.

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